HAVE A WONDERFUL, GRACIOUS AND HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

 A QUOTE AND THOUGHTS WORTH REMEMBERING:

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow".

~ Melody Beattie ~

These are troubling times and many are left with feelings of hopelessness, despair and frankly an attitude of skepticism on what this day means to millions of folks not only in this country but around the world.  The haves vs the have-nots which is a common refrain on the nightly news and on many sites in cyberspace.

We have each other and there are caring folks who not only stock the food pantries on holidays such as this but during the year.  They raise funds to help those  who've been treated unfairly by happenstance and continue to advocate utilizing various venues for those of us who are unemployed, homeless and marginalized by the larger societies.  Although for many there is very little to be thankful for; go deep within and find some gratitude for just being...gratitude for those who fight tirelessly for humanity...gratitude that yes things could be worse for many of us but we are still here and eking out a living for a better day. For those who are doing well or okay...let us not look in disdain and contempt toward those who have fallen on harder times.                             

The prayer of sharing should be in our hearts and thankfulness that you can make donations and  assist those who have various needs in such a way that they can eventually do for themselves.  In remembrance of this spirit; may your efforts become a part of who you are--not only during the holiday season but throughout the year.  This is my Thanksgiving appeal!

Peace and love....
Carolyn Moon 
 

The Importance of This Viral Success

I was at the emending stage of a post regarding aging and relationships when I first viewed this most pleasant and heartwarming father daughter dance team.  The implications and significance of how popular it became struck a chord for me especially in the area of group racial stereotypes.  It also  warranted a brief departure from the task at hand.  It was a success on YouTube and a lot of the black blogs showcased it.  As it were, when I awoke to Good Morning America and again viewed them in Times Square after a brief interview; I was struck by mainstream media wanting to share in the moment.  As they reenacted their dance routine I noticed that it was also on the huge LED Video Billboard as well.


It occurred to me that we-- meaning black bloggers and the mainstream media tend to focus on the harsh realities and dysfunctional behaviors in some of our communities and when something like this comes along; it's seen as the exception by most.  I recognize that when you have so many exceptions and anecdotal experiences to the contrary; it is no longer an anomaly or exception to the rule.  


There is a need for us to showcase more of what is wonderful and great about black people.... especially in some quarters.  It is stunning to me; how our resilience and determination as a group under the most harsh and oppressive circumstances continues despite the barriers and ongoing challenges we face.  I wrote a post on colorism and featured Dr. Na'im Akbar (July 20, 2011), a black psychologist whom I read and studied for many years and utilized his unique psychological perspective when it came to people of color in this country.  He made it clear that despite the efforts to make us as group feel less than...we have this ability to not only survive but persevere and for many do quite well.  There are many casualties but he recognizes that our ability to love ourselves is tantamount to how far we've come.  We have a distance to go but it's an amazing feat.  


Some-- I'm sure will think that my observations regarding this father daughter wedding reception dance are overstated.  However, what I saw and have seen on many occasions is that strong bond between daughters and fathers in our community and that so many of our fathers are loving and care for their children and families.  When that is portrayed in the black blogosphere and mainstream media--it is a good thing for we've been deluged with the absent father syndrome and family dysfunction as a "black thing".  The above video says to the world that what you see here is also a "black thing".  We need to love ourselves more. There have been a few entries to this effect on some of the blogs.  With all that said what we need is balance so we can view these events without that stale tape of exceptionalism running in our heads.
 

 

Video of Father & Daughter Dance Team as featured on GMA

Dawn Spencer's Testimony AugMe Foundation

This is a reposting of  last year's observation of Breast Cancer Month.  The fight continues with the efforts of those who contribute to  the cause and research this deadly disease.  It is  reassuring that  significant advances continue to  emerge in treating it, which should embolden all of  us.  "Survivors" or those who are "living with the disease", however you want to frame it have increased in numbers over the years.  As a survivor I can't stress enough the importance of self-exams and mammograms.  Early detection is  the key and those who have the most deadly tumors under the umbrella of breast cancer would benefit the most. 

It's that time of year again. It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month with all the commercials, ads and product endorsements with that pink bow of hope, and substantial checks written for this worthy cause.  I posted an entry on October, 2009 entitled "A Global Fight for our Lives" in which I featured not only domestic efforts to get women galvanized to take charge of their health, but also women around the world; especially those of color. Statistics still bear out that we are most likely to die from the disease due to advanced diagnosis of the illness when tested or we suffer from those rare aggressive forms, e.g., triple negative breast cancer.

In that post I also focused on Dawn Spencer, a career woman who had been diagnosed and treated for one of the more aggressive forms of breast cancer. She was an inspiration to me because she founded  AugMeFoundation. This organization provided breast prosthesis for those women who couldn't afford  them or had to settle for the ones that weren't comfortable or sized to provide a proper fit. She was also a motivational speaker on how to live and not die with this deadly disease.  The above video is just one of her speeches regarding the coping skills that are necessary in working through this illness. 

The stats haven't changed that much from those cited in the 2009 entry, however, advances in this field continue and many of the devastating surgeries and miserable side effects of adjuvant therapies have diminished.  Women who cannot benefit from reconstructive surgery or choose not to undergo the painful process of doing so have been helped by this organization.  The latter has an advocacy role and lobbies for Medicaid and Medicare to provide services to help these women through the most trying of times.  Self-image and esteem are battered and the support of loved ones and organizations to aid in the adjustment is crucial. She recognized this on a global level as well and  worked with Dr. Lisa Newman, a Surgical Oncologist in providing services to The Komfo Anokye Teaching Hospital in Kumasi, Ghana.  This is the main teaching and referral institution for the eastern and northern regions.

This picture of Dawn and her daughter resonates with me as I think of her final transition on February 23, 2010 as well as one of her quotes.."It's not about how much time you have, it's about what you do with it".  Dawn, I agree with you and the legions of other women who've refuse to become a victim of this disease. 

I've provided the following links to organizations that will assist you or a loved one as you struggle to make sense of this illness and hopefully decide to live fully and without restrictions.

Links:

http://www.sistersnetworkinc.org/

http://www.lbbc.org

http://www.tnbcfoundation.org

http://ww5.komen.org/

http://www.cancer.org

I Shall Return.... (♥♥)

I'm taking that long sought after trip to a place of solitude and I plan to return refreshed late September and ready to again tackle those issues that are intriguing and challenging with more grace, courage and hopefully wisdom.  As Labor Day approaches we must focus on what that holiday truly means.  We are facing a very deliberate and calculating assault on the workers in this country and they are suffering.  Their voices were first (prominently) heard in Wisconsin and now Ohio.  As with most righteous movements; it will spread across the nation and as we fight for the workers let us not forget the poor and those who have not been treated well by happenstance.    

One of my favorite poets, Lucille Clifton aptly describes my heart and mind as I cope with the realities of wanting to be heard and ageism especially in this society.  By all means...I'm not ready for the nursing home, however, the signs of how brief this existence can be have become more apparent.

There Is A Girl Inside

There is a girl inside.
She is randy as a wolf.
She will not walk away and leave these bones
to an old woman.

She is a green tree in a forest of kindling.
She is a green girl in a used poet.

She has waited patient as a nun
for the second coming,
when she can break through gray hairs
into blossom

and her lovers will harvest
honey and thyme
and the woods will be wild
with the damn wonder of it. 

~Lucille Clifton~  June 27, 1936 - February 13, 2010

IS GOD RESPONSIBLE FOR EVIL?

  
I've thought about this topic off and on for many years.  There were times that I found ways to justify why humankind with all the wonderful discoveries, great civilizations, medical breakthroughs and treatments not to mention great acts of kindness and charity is  also capable of some of the most vile and evil behaviors toward themselves and others.  Sometimes the latter is done in some perverted sense of following God's will or teachings expressed through the prophets and storytellers of the Old and New Testaments as well as those books that were left out of the canons.  There are those who would say it's the result of turning away from God and the absence of a moral center. Which lends to my ambivalent feelings about the explanations of how evil became a part of the human experience.  I was told by one religious leader that good and evil "flowed" from God.  Then there is the Genesis version of "The Almighty" casting Lucifer and his followers out of heaven which I found troubling for  there was a contradiction.  If that was the case, humankind was caught in the middle of the battle of wills between the omniscient and those in a spiritual realm that humans can only speculate about.  It didn't seem representative of a God that I was told who administered justice, love and amazing grace to the human family.  The vengeful God of the Old Testament notwithstanding.

One of my favorite programs is PBS' Closer to the Truth with Dr. Robert L. Kuhn, a public intellectual, scholar, narrator and interviewer of the series.  He takes on monumental challenges like issues related to God, the Cosmos, Consciousness and various philosophies and beliefs associated with them. He's dauntless in his pursuit to provide a balance by consulting various theologians and scholars on these subjects.  He allots equal time as well for atheists and scientists and their varying viewpoints which is why I think he is audacious in every sense of the word.  In some religious communities he's not viewed in a favorable light and is accused of distorting "the word of God" to suit his own philosophical beliefs. I've received e-mails admonishing "believers" not to view certain segments. 

Which leads to the segment, Did God Create Evil?.  He interviewed Nancey Murphy, a Professor of Christian Philosophy at Fuller Theological Seminary. What I found fascinating about this interview is
how she explained that God did not create evil, however, he set in motion forces that would allow that to happen with the premise that good would prevail.  My thought is--why at the expense of mankind?  Are tsunamis, earthquakes, famines, wars, oppression and the list could go on and on; the consequences for our stay on the planet?   If God is omnipresent, omnipotent and omniscient--why not another model for the greater good.  Surely the outcome is already known for...
                                            
The attribute of God by which God perfectly and eternally knows all things which can be known, past, present, and future. God knows how best to attain His desired ends.


Again, theologians and scholars are making quite a few assumptions about what God intended which takes hubris to a higher level.  The outcome seems to be a myriad of explanations from different religious denominations and philosophical viewpoints about one of the many mysteries of life which is evil.  There are other video interviews with various religious scholars and philosophers on the link I've provided and I would encourage the readers to check it out.  To question these things aren't necessarily indicators of blasphemy, agnosticism or atheism but a way for many of us to resolve or better understand the paradoxes of good versus evil.  

I am a believer in a higher power and as an individual will have to account for how I've lived my life.  There are so many different explanations and interpretations of scripture especially as it pertains to why God either specifically introduced evil into the equation or "allowed" it to be a menace to humankind as a consequence of the creative process.  An omniscient God would know that we would indeed prevail.

There is a hymn that was composed by Charles Tindley in 1905, We'll Understand It Better By and By that I heard growing up in the Baptist Church.  It was sung with hope and optimism for a better day and I'm sure a way to cope with a hostile society at that time. I tried  to make sense of it all as an adolescent for I wondered how long would "by and by" be.  As a senior citizen I'm still open to the various explanations and documentations for the concept of evil.  This journey is about growing and gaining knowledge and I will continue to do so with an inquiring mind until the final transition.
 
Links:
http://closertotruth.com/ 
http://www.beingjewish.com/faqs/conflict.html
http://goarticles.com/article/Islam-Good-vs-Evil/4450080/
http://www.allaboutworldview.org/good-vs-evil.htm

The Psychology of Colorism That Permeates The Diaspora

 

Dr. Na'im Akbar, a leading black psychologist addresses the issue of the psychology of colorism and self-destruction .  We see the well known study of black children preferring white dolls and their belief that being black means you are bad or not as good as those of lighter hues.  This particular study forces us to realize just how insidious the impact of white supremacy is and what it does to our young.      Dr. Akbar warns us of the  legacy of self-hate and low group esteem experienced by people of African descent in this country and throughout the diaspora.  Yet, somehow we've managed to forge on with each generation in spite of it.There is also an admonishment that while many of us continue to struggle and do well, there are many casualties that must not be ignored who suffer psychologically, socially, politically and economically within many of our communities.  The building of self esteem and worth in our children begins at home and is either challenged or enhanced by adults or our peers  in our schools, churches, civic organizations and media.  The sad and disturbing fact is that for many of our children, the first time they are told or feel inferior or "less than" is with their parents or relatives---the folks who look like them.                                                                  

I don't want to go on and on about the subject of colorism--but I will.  My request at this point is to indulge my revisiting an article featured on Yahoo News some time ago by Dr. Neil Persadsingh,  a leading Jamaican dermatologist, who wrote about the growing number of dark-skinned women opting to lighten their skin.

Briefly, he spoke of the devastating consequences of women in his country who are using home made bleaching concoctions to lighten their skin and for those who can afford it are buying creams with hydroquinones mixed with steroid cortisone.  They feel that having lighter skin tones will increase their chances for advancement in jobs, educational opportunities and social connections.  He cites unfortunate outcomes of hyperpigmentation, skin mutations, Cushing's syndrome and cancer risks for many of them.  This practice is so widespread and insidious that he recounts an event in his office that was especially disturbing.

"I know of one woman who started to bleach her baby. She got very annoyed with me when I told her to stop immediately, and she left my office. I often wonder what became of that baby." 

He further states that it's not just self esteem issues but the colonial past of this country and the fact that black was viewed as bad or evil.  Every country that has a history of imperialism, colonialism and slavery by proponents of white supremacy continues to deal with these issues.

More are shedding light on this problem.  Producer Bill Duke is trying to secure funding for his film titled "Dark Girls" which addresses this subject and hasn't had much success in public donations.  I can't help but wonder why he hasn't spoken to the well-known black filmmakers to solicit their help.  Who knows?  He may have done that and there is a skittishness about the subject or it may have the makings of a flop, i.e. poor attendance by people of color.  Many of us are in denial or hide behind the taboo of airing our "dirty linen" or frankly have become group weary and if it doesn't pertain to them as individuals--it's not a problem.  I see more of that now and it's disconcerting.

Please view the trailer on "Dark Girls" and begin the dialogue in your homes and talk with your children when you hear them utter denigrating statements about darker skin hues.  As adults watch what you say around our children. Stop the name calling.  Remember our children are clean slates and what we say or how we say it becomes a part of who they are.  We should have art in our homes depicting people of color with our wide spectrum of hues.  I grew up in a neighborhood and in my own extended family where our hues varied and we didn't make distinctions based on that.

When we are reading those bedtime stories, get books that showcase our experiences as well as Dr. Seuss and Charlotte's Web.  I used to read Children of the Sun and similar books  with beautiful illustrations of black children and adults to my daughters when they were young.  Lastly, adults should "call each other out" when denigrating remarks are made regarding  skin color.  It's hurtful with implications that stay with us and unfortunately are passed on to the next generation.  This preview of Dark Girls makes that fact painfully clear.